cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Randomize
