I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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