You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
