Can Purell be used as lube?
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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