did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
