had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
So many bounce houses so little time
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize