why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
