Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
