Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
