New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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