Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize