So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize
