Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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