tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
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