dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
Randomize