What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
