I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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