Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Randomize