party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Randomize
