can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Randomize
