I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Randomize
