Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
