Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Randomize