1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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