Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
