i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
