i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
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