is your mom at the bar?
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
why do cheetos always look like penises
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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