No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
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