I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
now i know why i became what i already was.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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