im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
Randomize