Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
Randomize
