try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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