I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
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