idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Randomize
