Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
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