Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
