Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Randomize
