It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Randomize