you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
