reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Randomize