Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Randomize