it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Randomize
