this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
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