I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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