We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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