you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
