I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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