I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
what day is it and did you see me today?
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Randomize