He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
