its not stalking. its research.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
It's rum buckets o'clock
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Randomize
